Now my ideas have just got clearer and I have a really inspiring idea which has led me to others, finally!

I have got a lot of ideas in my sketch book but I feel now my work/ideas have changed I have decided to make a more neat sketchbook (the other one is to messy.)

the ideas started flowing by me randomly typing into google, clothing dipped in plaster. and this is when the ideas started coming.

I feel as though none of the pictures i found was actually useful to me but i used the actual idea of me typing the words in google for inspiration. i will not use these photos to inspire me. as they didn't.

 I would like to use this materil (plaster) and go back to fashion subject area rather than photography (which I am not interested in) and want to create garments dipped (or try to) in plaster. which thank god I typed them in otherwise id be stuck with the bath idea.


just came back to this post after athough week. done a lot in my sketch book but I want to rant on my blog. I feel the dipping clothing in fabrics idea hasn't really progressed I feel although now i have this idea and it inspired me so much that i cant get it out of my head and go further with my work. i have created although pieces with both clothing and fabrics, watching how fabrics get frozen with plaster, the way the move and how they are positions.
how fabrics are meant to move and flow but the plaster stops this. but still makes it look like it has movent with the seams and drapes to the fabric.

I need to keep invertigating and find other alternative of my idea to research to improve and develop.

For some reason, looking back I thought of some shit ideas.
I was mostly influenced at the time by Katie Crawford. as she used the theme anxiety through out her work (which she portrayed well.

My ideas...

using a bath tub and filling it with black food colouring (less likely to stain)

using photography for this idea

also wearing clothing which will cling to me in the bath as well as clothing the fabric

use a thin, free flowing material

look like I am drowning



another idea...


inspired by an old inspiring artist of mine in the past with previous work.


Lucy McRae!


using tubes which will wrap around someone's body and filling it with colour water. (pumping it through the pipes

shows suffocation and feel tight or restricted.


I need to look into these ideas more and investigate into these artists. on why they did it and what they are trying to show through there work.

I also need to look more in detail of my ideas and this is only my first through ideas so I'm sure it will improve or change.

 

Starting over

 

I've decided to start blogger again. as ik want to rant out through writing. this will be mostly used to get my artist research and an easier way of showing the images I have collected. I feel that my sketch book is good for reflection but I don't feel I am getting all that's in my head. therefore this will be a rant/ long convocation to my self. I feel comftable with blogger but i know i only used it because i had to for my other projects, and found out for my fmp i can use it in my own way now.

(this may be a shit way and will be boring to read if you do, but its for me.)

 

 

 

start of my project. i feel i didn't go into my head enoight and show what was going on in my head when i was given the project and even through ive only got a thew weeks left for my fmp i want to reflect back to see where i started and get my head together.

 

 

i knew my idea before i even started my fmp. i found an artist while still looking for my metaphorise reasech (different project) ive never been so sure about my theme and i knew i wanted to show this deaply. i found an artist on fb first, bit typical lol. but her name is katie Crawford who was studying as a photoagraphy student at LSU. she created her project 'my anxious heart' in spring 2015 on her own experience with social axiety. she used materials which showed the metal illness well. i researched further into her own website.

 

she quotes 'i have battled anxiety for a decade, and i finally have been able to capture it and expose it in the light'.

 

which she did do perfectly. she showed the physical tole anxiety gives. and used photogahy to show whats its like in her mind and possible others with anxiety. this helped me to feel that not only others have anxiety but how people feel the same, and the impact of her photogrsphy not only inspired me but related and helped me.

a glass of water isn’t heavy. it’s almost mindless when you have to pick one up. but what if you couldn’t empty it or set it down? what if you had to support its weight for days… months… years? the weight doesn’t change, but the burden does. at a certain point, you can’t remember how light it used to seem. sometimes it takes everything in you to pretend it isn’t there. and sometimes, you just have to let it fall.

 

 

 

 

my head is filling with helium. focus is fading. such a small decision to make. such an easy question to answer. my mind isn’t letting me. it’s like a thousands circuits are all crossing at once.

 

 

they keep telling me to breathe. i can feel my chest moving up and down. up and down. up and down. but why does it feel like i’m suffocating? i hold my hand under my nose, making sure there is air. i still can’t breathe.

 

 

i want to do this, infact i already decuided once i seen her work, to put people in my perspective. and show people what its like for me. therefore i had athough ideas already.

 

things i feel with an axiety or panic attack (very personal)

• feeling overwhelmed
• feeling like everyone is staring at me
• really hot starts in my leps and head
• feet and hands heavy and singling
• heavy feeling in my head
• rasing heart
• feeling sufforcated
• trapped in my own mind
• feeling like I'm going to die
• sick       

ideas to show this

 

• drowning in a bath (want clinging materil)
• showing heat
• suffocating (rope or cling film)
• heavy ness somehow